Last year on my birthday I wasn’t drinking rum buckets, I was happily sipping on water. And daydreaming about what you would be like. Would you have my curly blond hair? Would you get lucky and get dad’s blue eyes? While his friends excitedly patted his back, your father relished his beer and smiled – taking it all in. Burgers were flipped, beanbags were tossed, and the chatter of the upcoming Freeze baby hung in the air.
The following Tuesday we had our first real ultrasound. Although this wasn’t my first time in this room… Just a week prior I sat here shaking because before I knew I was pregnant I had taken some not safe for baby antibiotics and was worried. As soon as I saw those two lines, I called the doctor, googled side affects (don’t ever do this) and was left anxious beyond belief until they squeezed me in to confirm a heartbeat. Now, a prenatal visit under my belt, I felt familiar with the routine; I was only left with pure giddiness as I lifted my shirt and revealed my belly .
Reclined in the plastic chair, Matt held my hand. We had no idea that in seconds our life would change forever:
“Let’s find us some babies!” the tech said.
“One would be just fine!” I smiled, grinning at Matt.
“You never know!” She replied.
“Actually… Twins do run in my family…” I said as I felt the cool gel smear on my stomach.
Stop. I’m not sure why this thought never occurred to me, but I can honestly say not ONCE did this cross my mind. In all my time daydreaming of what you would be like I never thought you would be plural.
“You guys aren’t, going to believe me…” The tech laughed.
We looked on the screen to two tiny bubbles in my belly. Was she some sort of Gypsy?
The words, “twins,” “holy shit,” and “oh my god” were repeated the entire rest of the exam. I don’t remember what she said, I don’t remember what prenatal vitamins my OBGYN recommended, or anything else she said as we sat in her office to discuss. I don’t remember getting vials and vials of blood drawn, something that usually sends me into an anxiety attack. I remember my head in between my knees after almost passing out. I remember cursing like a sailor. I remember looking over at Matt, his face as white as a ghost. I remember being so confused. I remember crying because it was crazy and wonderful all the same.
A year later, it still sounds strange to say children… plural. In one afternoon I went from looking forward to rocking my first baby to googling “double strollers” and “how to hold two babies.” That night I went from wanting to take my pregnancy “day by day”, not wanting to find out the sex… to buying multiple books on multiples, and counting down the days to 20 weeks when we could officially be told genders so I could start planning everything. I went from nervous/excited pregnant girl to really nervous/excited pregnant girl. I guess you could say my emotions doubled.
I’m not sure when it really hit me that my belly was holding two babies; I still don’t think it really has. 34 weeks in, 25 weeks out and I’m still walking around the majority of the time with the look of pure dumbfound and also pure joy. I have children, plural; and it is twice as awesome as I had imagined it to be.
Buy One Get One Freeze 